Category Archives: Friends

On being the one behind the camera

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Behind the camera

Another post on photography, I know! I hope you’re not sick of them yet.

When I go out with friends, typically, I am the one who brings the camera. I don’t always have one with me, but when I go to a birthday party or something like that, I always do, regardless of whether it’s my own party or a friend’s. I love taking pictures as you all know, and I like to have pictures of my friends and me. I like to think that my friends do too. I try to make sure to send them the pictures (even though sometimes it takes a while).

Unfortunately, usually, I am the only one with a camera. Or another friend or two may bring a camera but not actually take any pictures. Or take pictures but never send them to me. The result of that is that I have a lot of pictures of my friends but none of my friends and me. When you are the one behind the camera, you tend not to be in front of it a lot.

Sometimes I end up asking a friend to take a picture with my camera, and often what they end up doing is take a picture of just me. I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, but if I wanted a picture of just myself, I’d take it myself (at home, using a self-timer or MySpace style). Not just that, frequently they end up being really close-up (way too close-up) unflattering shots which make me wonder what the person taking the picture is thinking. When I am out with friends, I want pictures of my friends and me. And usually I end up with none or very few.

Of course sometimes you just end up having such a good time, that taking pictures is not your number one priority. That happens to me too. But I always try to take at least a few pictures when I go out. But when I am the only one doing it, those few pictures are the only ones I end up with.

For my farewell party, I was the only one who brought a camera. I ended up with very few good pictures. I was in two of those good ones, though one is blurry. There were a few more of me, one one of those pictures of just me, and one unflattering one that my friend took again and that one turned out blurry. I think my friends assume that I bring a camera because I enjoy taking photos so much. I do love taking pictures, true. But I don’t like being the only one who does. The reason I always bring a camera is not only because I love taking pictures, but because I know that if I don’t, we may end up with no pictures at all.

Maybe my assuming that other people also like to have pictures of themselves and their friends is wrong. Or maybe it’s just my friends who don’t. Because I certainly see lots of pictures on Facebook being tagged by other people constantly. Most of the pictures on Facebook of me were taken by me/with my camera. I hardly ever get tagged by anyone because hardly anyone ever takes pictures at parties etc. Now I really don’t care how many pictures of me are on Facebook or how many were uploaded by whom or whether they are uploaded at all, but I do wish I had more pictures of my friends and me. And I wish I wasn’t usually the only one who brings a camera and therefore has to bring one. I wish I wasn’t the only one taking pictures, and I wish I didn’t have to ask a friend every single time I want to be in a picture rather than being the one taking it.

I love my friends, I really do. This is not a reason I value their friendship any less. It’s just something that I wish was different. Whenever I see photos on Facebook of friends and their friends, I wish my friends were a little more camera-happy. I love to be able to look at pictures of events that happened a long time ago, to remember, to reminisce, to look at pictures of my friends, of my life, of friends that I haven’t seen in a long time. Maybe part of the reason I value this so much is that I don’t take it for granted that I will always be able to see my friends in person. I have moved a few times before, and I have no doubt that I will eventually move to a different place again. Many of my friends are a lot more settled than I am in that way, having lived in either Heidelberg or Munich all their lives, with no desire to leave.

With my family, things are quite similar. We hardly have any pictures of us as a family, except for some that were taken at weddings, high school graduations, vacations and other events. My parents did take pictures of us growing up of course, but at some point the need to document our lives seemed to vanish. In a way, this bothers me a little less because I simply haven’t gotten to see my family as much while living in Heidelberg as my friends there. But I wonder if one day I will regret not having more pictures of my family and friends.

Do you like to keep pictures of your family and friends? Are you always the one behind the camera as well or do you have friends who are enthusiastic about snapping pictures?

P.S. Yes, that is my old now broken camera in the picture. R.I.P., you served me well.

Protected: A very happy birthday

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An unlikely friendship five years later

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After taking my exam Saturday morning, I hopped on a train to Frankfurt where my friend J. picked me up at the station. J. was my roommate while I was living in Norman, Oklahoma. For 9 months, we shared a room, and neither of us can believe how well that worked out and how well we got along. Not only was sharing such small space for such a long time really something to get used to, I also never expected us to get along as well as we did, because we are so different.

I think the only thing we have in common at first sight is that we are both German, we are both blondes, and we both went to the same university. That was reason enough (well, the blonde part didn’t really play a role) for us to decide to room together, rather than be paired up with a random stranger. But honestly, I never thought it would work as well as it did. J. majored in math, I major in literature. She is very pretty and very smart, and was quite the manizer (I know that’s not a word but now it is!) when we lived in Oklahoma. She always dresses up, always wears high heels, and considers a 3″ heel low. While I loved and still love wearing jeans and a t-shirt and flip flops. Now she works in management consulting which is so not my world and never will be. But you know, aside from these obvious differences, we really got along great, and we still do. Turns out, all those differences didn’t matter. And I am very glad that we went to Oklahoma and roomed there together, because without that, we would have probably never met, let alone become friends.

In late 2007, while I lived in Spain, J. graduated and moved to Frankfurt for a job, and the last time we met must have been sometime in or before July 2007. We did stay in touch, though, and when we were on the phone a few weeks ago, we decided that a meet-up was way overdue.

Buildings at the Römerberg in Frankfurt

After J. picked me up at the train station, we went for some sight-seeing in the city center of Frankfurt, and then we went to her apartment to drop off my stuff. We had some wine (okay, I was actually pretty tipsy by the time we went out for dinner at 9:30pm), and then went for dinner at a sports bar (hello buffalo wings & country fries goodness!) and a cocktail at another bar. Back at her place we stayed up a little longer to chat and have a little more wine (resulting in my being somewhat hungover the next day) and today we slept in and had breakfast, and cooked lunch together.

A church (Dreikönigskirche) in Frankfurt

Cooking together was actually a somewhat weekly tradition we had in Oklahoma and we reminisced about that time and about all the meals we had. Often we invited our friend B. over when we cooked, and he had to eat our sometimes good, sometimes not so good meals. I remember one time I tried to fry potatoes without cooking them first (which always works for my parents) but the potatoes stayed semi-raw (turns out you need to put a lid on the pan!), but we ate them anyway. Another time J.’s steaks didn’t turn out so great. And yet another time, B. thought it was very unusual for us to have made a lasagna without cottage cheese. Turns out, that’s how you cook lasagna in the States. Well, it’s not how we do lasagna here, it’s béchamel sauce all the way.

We both had an amazing time in Oklahoma, and it was great to remember things together, especially because we each remembered things the other had forgotten about. It was just great to spend time with her. It still seems very natural and we have a great time just chatting and laughing. We agreed that I would definitely visit her again before I leave Heidelberg, probably after my exams. I have no idea where I will be moving once I have a job, and while it could be Frankfurt, it could well be further away than I live now. So we want to make sure to hang out again before I leave.

The beautiful view of the Frankfurt skyline from J.'s bedroom

I had such a blast with her, and it was a great way to unwind after the five-hour exam that I took Saturday morning. Which I will write about in another post.

How was your weekend?

P.S. I will publish another post shortly that will be protected of a picture of J. and me (for reasons of privacy). But if you have commented here before and are not a stranger, you are absolutely welcome to ask me for the password. Really, I do not mind at all. So either email me (dreamoncemore [at] gmail.com) or comment on this post and mention that you’d like the password.

Home

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Since yesterday, I have been home in Munich. I am going to spend the next couple of weeks here, before I go back home to Heidelberg. The way I use home to refer to both cities can be confusing at times, but both places are home to me. Munich is my hometown and it always will be. I have my childhood and high school friends here, and we meet up whenever I am back home.

Heidelberg is the town that has been my home (on & off) for the past 7.5 years. I moved there in October 2002, and with the exception of two years, and about 2-3 months per year, have been living there. I have a life there, a job, close friends. I love the town.

But Munich still comes first in my heart. And because the next couple of weeks are going to be the last weeks I spend here before finishing my exams in July (and possibly until the end of August), I am going to try to make the most of my time here. There are really only two things I came here for: to spend time with friends & family, and to study.

So far a trip to the movies has been planned with one friend, coffee with another, and a bloggy date with the tex-pat. (She’s a friend I met via my previous blog! How cool is that?) Next weekend will be one dedicated to birthday celebrations, first my best friend’s (= a road trip train ride to the town she goes to college in), and then my mom’s for which I’ll be testing my culinary skills and making a key lime pie for the first time. I hope I will get to see all of my friends here, as well as my brother and sister, and at the same time be able to keep up (or catch up really) with my study schedule.

But right now? I am just really excited to go downtown for some window shopping tomorrow (and some actual notebook mouse shopping because mine broke) and then meet up with a friend to see Up in the Air. And a trip to the Victorian House for tea and scones or something else equally English with another friend on Sunday.

What are your plans for this weekend?